“They were close to the end of the beginning . . .”Isn't it funny how the next hour is unspoiled, devoid of mistakes, perfect and yet as you draw close to the hour another hour awaits? I forgot to document a milestone late last month and i feel so bad about it. Well, i thought about it, i just didn't write about it. The beauty of it all is that every hour, every day, every month...the
― Stephen King.
― Stephen King.
milestones remain engraved.
If you like dough, a good read and watermelon you are in the right place. If you like lollipops and still believe in fairy tales, I'm afraid you in big trouble.
This milestone was an order. A special kind of order. One that i looked forward to. It was all wrapped up. It was a mystery. The more bigger and weirder it felt each day, the more i longed for this order. One thing though that nobody discloses is that, if you embrace a special order, you get to do something out of the norm. Something scarce and worth seeking out. I don't know what your order is, but i know it is something special. Something you heart. I loved my order then, i fall in love on stellar days and the even on the eerie ones.
A year and some months ago, the rib and i, held a 'kumbaya'. A long, terrific, tiresome 'kumbaya' . A very, long one. It was just after that movie and then we decided to call it a day by downing the wine bottle. We wanted to reuse the bottle as a candle holder (ding!! Thank me later), just in case power black out came in between our infinity talks. Nine months later, the order came to be. Ethan.
That same night i longed for enough for just the both of us. I longed to give as much as the thumping heart could contain and i longed to get a reciprocal of that. Just for the two of us. I could only hold much attention of one being and embrace myself with the love. My desire to long had a form of happiness, a shriek of joy, toughness of steel and an umbrella to shelter the naysayers. Our circle longed for no addition, well, not at that moment. The horizon held hope of two or three additions when the time was right.
I guess one does not have to be ready to accept responsibility. You learn along the way. Reason why i never wrote this early is because i don't want my little boy to grow up so fast. I'm still in denial. I'm yet to come into terms with growth. I still I'm strong enough to play hide and seek behind the house doors. I love to see you struggle feeding yourself and making a mess just because you want to prove you are independent. I still want to revisit your first steps. I can't get enough of the bubble bath play. Never stop calling me maaaamaa with those cute little innocent eyes. Remember daaaadaah will always give you the strongest hugs, always. Ethan my little explorer, you are my best special order.
I will take it easy and give the best i can. Oh Ethan!! Go on and play. Grow up strong and healthy. No, don't mind maaaama, i just got something in my eye. I'll be alright.
With so much love that my heart can contain!!